“Sam, I’ve read that more men than women take their own lives and that death by suicide is the single biggest killer in men under the age of 35. Why is that?”
CONTENT WARNING:
Thank you so much for asking this question. Suicide is a taboo topic that we need to talk about more. It’s true that statistics show that death by suicide is the single biggest killer in men under the age of 35. However, statistics also show that more women than men suffer with depression and more women than men attempt suicide. So why are more men dying by suicide than women?
There isn’t one simple answer. There are a variety of contributary factors – let’s look at some of the possible main ones.
The method of suicide makes a difference. Men are statistically more likely to use more violent, final methods. This means that they have died before anyone can intervene.
Then we have to look at societal pressures on men to be more emotionally restrained and not be seen as weak. Women are more likely to talk about their problems and seek help. It’s a running joke in my, and many other households, that when current husband gets together with his friends they don’t talk about anything meaningful or really know anything about each other’s lives. This stigma means men are less likely to seek help.
Men are also statistically more likely to self-medicate with alcohol or drugs to numb the emotions. Unfortunately, this doesn’t actually work – it worsens mental health and interferes with judgement and decision making.
The financial pressures of life are often felt more strongly by men. They are expected to be the main breadwinner for families and if they are unable to do so they may believe this means they are not good enough and a failure.
I do want to say at this point that we know that interventions aimed at supporting mental health, and preventing suicide work. Raising awareness, reducing stigma, talking openly about mental health, seeking help all work. There is hope. If you, or anyone you know, is thinking about suicide please encourage them to seek help.
Samaritans helpline – 116 123
Suicide Prevention UK – 0800 689 5652
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